Dad Car Jokes


The Daddest Bad Jokes 

To all the amazing dads in the Pikes Peak region, you are such an important part of your family, providing all those critical dad skills like carting kids to practice, helping with homework and providing that all-to-important fatherly humor. We wanted to help replenish your supply of jokes with some of our favorite car-related bad jokes. Er, dad jokes. 


Q: Why was the car always tired? 

A: It never took any brakes.


Q: What’s a movie they could never make about a Lamborghini?

 A: Silence of the Lambos.


A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, I’m fine to serve you but you better not start anything.


Q: Why do pistons make such bad employees? 

A: They only work after they are fired. 


My wife asked me if I could go wash the car with our son. I told her a hose would probably be more efficient.


Q: What did the car say to the stoplight?

A: You’ve changed, man!


Q: Why are standards so reliable?

A: They always come in clutch.


My wife gave birth to our son in the car on our way to the hospital. We named him Carson.


Q: Why did the man remove the wheels from his car before a road trip? 

A: He wanted it to drive tirelessly. 


I was really stoked about buying one of those new electric cars. But when I got to the dealership the prices were just too shocking! 


Q: What is a Toyota lover’s favorite food?

A: Taco-mas.


Q: Why does it always get dark when Bob goes by?

A: He drives an Eclipse.


Q: What has 10 letters and starts with G-A-S? 

A: Automobile.


Q: How is a golf ball different from a Chevy 350?

A: I can drive a golf ball 300 yards.


Q: What’s the best pickup line? 

A: Wanna hang out in my bed?


Q: How did you stop your teen from texting and driving? 

A: I bought him a Ford Focus.


Q: What kind of vehicle does an egg drive? 

A: A Yolks-wagen.


Q: What is Yoda’s favorite vehicle?

A: A Toy-yoda. 


Q: What is the best vehicle to drive on May 5th?

A: A Ford Fiesta.


Q: Why should you always carry peanut butter in your car?

A: In case there’s a traffic jam.


Q: Why can’t motorcycles do planks? 

A: Because they’re always two-tired.


Q: What’s a Tesla’s favorite dance move? 

A: The electric slide.


Q: What did you do with all those old car batteries? 

A: I gave them away, free of charge. 


Q: Why did the man throw his spare tire into the woods when he got lost?

A.Where there’s a wheel, there’s a way. 


Q: Why does it cost so much to put air in a tire?



We hope these jokes make your family groan in exasperation with each new terrible answer. Maybe you’ll even get some eye rolls and sighs.


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